Whisper

(Source: simplydisneythings, via magicalasso)

“In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

- Rita Rudner

“The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

“I lent a guy ten grand to get plastic surgery, and now I don’t know what he looks like.

(Source: claireyg, via ourjulyintherain)

“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

- Earl Wilson

“Work? Yeah, I tried that once. Worst seven minutes of my life.

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